If you’ve been asked to say a few words at someone’s memorial service you might be worrying or even panicking now. A memorial speech is different from a eulogy but a lot of people aren’t sure about those differences.
If you’re in that position you may be trying to figure out what you’re supposed to say. And for how long.
Well a memorial service usually has several speakers and each one has a slightly different job. Someone welcomes everyone. Someone (or a few people) shares the life story.
Friends and coworkers get up for a couple of minutes each. And someone has to wrap things up and tell people where the food is.
So if you need some help below you’ll find 21 memorial speech examples divided by who’s speaking and what kind of service it is. They’re written to be read out loud, they’re short enough to deliver and every one of them is meant to be changed. Put in your details and your own stories wherever you can.
What Is a Memorial Speech?
A memorial speech is any talk given at a memorial service to honor someone who has died. That’s covers a pretty wide area and that’s on purpose.
The main difference between a memorial service and a funeral is that the body usually isn’t present at a memorial. It might happen after a cremation or a private burial and it can take place weeks or even months after the death.
Because there’s less of a rush memorials are usually a bit more relaxed and personal than funerals. More people get invited to speak.
A eulogy is one type of memorial speech. It’s the main tribute, usually given by a close family member or friend, and it tends to cover the person’s whole life.
But not every memorial speech is a eulogy. The welcome at the start, a coworker’s two minute story and the closing thank you are all memorial speeches too.
If you’ve been asked to give the main tribute our eulogy examples will be more useful to you. If you’ve been asked to say “a few words” you’re in the right place.
How Long Should a Memorial Speech Be?
Shorter than you think. Most people speak at somewhere around 130 to 150 words a minute when they’re reading aloud and nerves usually make that faster.
As a rough guide:
- Welcome or opening remarks: 1 to 2 minutes (roughly 150 to 300 words)
- A “few words” from a friend or coworker: 2 to 3 minutes (roughly 250 to 400 words)
- A main family tribute: 3 to 5 minutes (roughly 400 to 700 words)
- Closing remarks: 1 to 2 minutes
If you aren’t sure – ask whoever is organizing the service how much time you have. When there are five or six speakers, two extra minutes each will add up quickly. I’ve never heard anyone complain that a memorial speech was too short.
Structure for Any Memorial Speech
You don’t need anything fancy. Almost every good memorial speech follows a very similar shape:
- Say who you are. Not everyone in the room will know you. “I’m Dana and I worked with Mike for eleven years” is enough.
- Share one or two specific memories. One real story is better than a list of nice adjectives.
- Say what they meant to you (or to everyone). This is the main part of it.
- Close with a goodbye, a thank you or a line that lands. A short quote or a few words straight to the person who died works well here.
That’s it. If you keep to that you’ll be fine.
Opening and Welcome Speeches
Somebody has to stand up first. It might be an officiant or a funeral director but at a lot of memorials it’s a family member or a close friend acting as the host.
The is to welcome people, set the tone and let everyone know what’s going to happen. Not tell a big life story of the deceased.
1. A Warm Welcome from the Family
Good afternoon, everyone. For those of you who don’t know me, I’m [Your Name], [Name]’s [relationship].
On behalf of the whole family, thank you for being here. Some of you have traveled a long way and some of you came straight from work, and every single one of you being in this room means more than we can really say.
Today isn’t about saying goodbye so much as it’s about remembering. We’re going to hear from a few of the people who knew [Name] best. There’ll be some stories, probably some tears and almost certainly a few laughs, because that’s who [he/she/they] was.
After the service please stay and join us for food and drinks in [location]. [Name] never let anyone leave the house hungry and we’re not about to start now.
Thank you again for coming. Let’s begin.
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2. A Short Welcome When the Memorial Is Weeks or Months Later
This one works when there’s been a gap between the death and the memorial, which is really common after a cremation.
Hello and welcome. My name is [Your Name] and I’m [Name]’s [relationship].
It’s been [number] weeks since we lost [Name]. In some ways that feels like forever and in other ways it still doesn’t feel real. We wanted to wait until we could bring everyone together properly, and looking around this room, I’m so glad we did.
We’re not here to be sad all afternoon. We’re here to remember a life that was really worth remembering. You’ll hear from family and friends, and later there’ll be a chance for anyone who wants to share a memory to come up and say a few words.
Thank you for coming and for loving [Name] the way you did.
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3. Opening Remarks from an Officiant or Celebrant
If you’re leading the service but didn’t know the person well it’s fine to say so.
Good morning and welcome. My name is [Your Name] and I’ve been asked by [Name]’s family to lead us through today’s service.
I didn’t have the privilege of knowing [Name] for very long. But in the time I’ve spent with [his/her/their] family this past week I’ve heard about [a detail, such as “the garden he grew for thirty years” or “her terrible jokes and her famous pound cake”]. I’ve heard enough to know that [Name] was deeply loved and that [he/she/they] will be deeply missed.
We gather today to honor that life, to support one another and to give thanks for the time we had. Let’s take a moment of quiet together before we begin.
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Memorial Speeches from Family Members
These are shorter than a full eulogy and they’re written for family members who want to say something personal without giving the main tribute. If you’re giving the main tribute take a look at our eulogy examples for a mother or eulogies for a father for longer versions.
One thing I’ve noticed over the years is that family speeches do best when they’re about the small things. So not things like “she was the kindest person I ever knew”. Go with the little details as that’s what people remember the most.
4. From a Spouse or Partner
I’m [Your Name]. [Name] and I were married for [number] years.
People keep asking me how I’m doing and I keep saying “okay,” which isn’t really true. The truth is the house is too quiet. [He/She/They] used to [small daily habit, such as “sing badly while making coffee” or “read the weather forecast out loud every morning even though I’d already seen it”]. I’d give anything to hear that again.
We had a good life. Not a perfect one, but a good one. We raised [children/a family/a very spoiled dog], we argued about the thermostat for [number] years and we always, always made up before bed.
[Name], thank you for choosing me. Thank you for every ordinary day. I’ll love you until it’s my turn.
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5. From an Adult Child
Hi everyone, I’m [Your Name], [Name]’s [son/daughter/child].
When I was little I thought my [mom/dad] could fix anything. Broken bikes, broken toys, broken hearts. Turns out I was mostly right.
The thing I keep coming back to is how [he/she/they] showed up. Every game, every school play, every bad day when I called home crying from college. [He/She/They] never made a big speech about it. [He/She/They] just came.
I don’t think I ever said thank you enough. So I’m saying it now, in front of everybody. Thank you, [Mom/Dad]. I’m going to try to show up for people the way you showed up for me.
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6. From a Brother or Sister
I’m [Your Name] and I’m [Name]’s [brother/sister/sibling]. [Older/Younger], for the record, which [he/she/they] never let me forget.
We shared a bedroom for [number] years and fought about pretty much everything in it. The light switch. The radio. Whose side of the floor the laundry was on. But if anyone else ever picked on me, [Name] was the first one there.
We grew up and moved to different places, and we didn’t talk every day. But we never had to. Some people just know you, all the way down. [Name] was that person for me.
I’m going to miss our phone calls. I’m going to miss being the [younger/older] one. Most of all I’m going to miss having someone in the world who remembered everything I remembered.
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Memorial Speeches from a Friend
Friends often get asked to speak because they knew a side of the person the family didn’t always see. So try to tell the room something they might not know.
For something longer our eulogy examples for a best friend go into more depth.
7. From a Close Friend
Hi, I’m [Your Name]. [Name] and I met [how you met, such as “in a terrible pottery class in 2009”] and we’ve been friends ever since.
If you knew [Name], you know [he/she/they] had a way of making you feel like the most interesting person in the room. [He/She/They] asked real questions and actually listened to the answers. I don’t think I realized how rare that was until now.
There’s one story I have to tell. [Share a short, specific memory here. Two or three sentences is plenty.]
That was [Name] in a nutshell. [Generous/stubborn/hilarious/loyal] to the very end.
I’m so grateful I got to be your friend. I’ll miss you every day, and I’ll keep [something you’ll do in their honor, such as “ordering the extra-spicy wings even though I can’t handle them”] for you.
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8. From a Lifelong Friend
My name is [Your Name] and I’ve known [Name] for [number] years. That’s longer than most of you have been alive, which [he/she/they] would find very funny.
We were kids together. We were [young parents/roommates/troublemakers] together. We went through weddings and divorces and new babies and bad haircuts, and through all of it we never stopped calling each other.
People don’t get many friends like that. If you’re lucky you get one. I was lucky.
[Name], we’ll pick this conversation up later. Save me a seat.
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Short “Few Words” Memorial Speeches
A lot of memorials have an open microphone part where anyone can come up and share. If you’ve decided on the spot that you want to say something, or you only have a minute, these short speeches will help you get through it without talking too much.
If you’d like more ideas in this style our short eulogy examples have lots.
9. A Simple Memory
Hi, I’m [Your Name]. I knew [Name] through [how you knew them]. I just wanted to say that [he/she/they] [a specific kind thing they did for you]. I’ve never forgotten it and I never will. Thank you, [Name].
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10. For Someone You Didn’t Know Very Well
My name is [Your Name]. I didn’t know [Name] as well as most of you in this room. But every time I saw [him/her/them], [he/she/they] [smiled/asked about my kids/remembered my name]. That’s the kind of thing you notice. I’m sorry for your loss and I’m glad I got to know [him/her/them] even a little.
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11. A Lighthearted Few Words
Hi everyone. I’m [Your Name], and I was [Name]’s [neighbor/bowling partner/fishing buddy] for [number] years. [He/She/They] beat me at [activity] more times than I’d like to admit in public. I’m only saying it now because [he/she/they] can’t hear me brag about the one time I won. We’re going to miss you, [Name]. The [bowling alley/lake/block] won’t be the same.
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12. Speaking for a Group
Hello, I’m [Your Name]. I’m here on behalf of [group name, such as “the Tuesday morning walking group” or “everyone at the Oak Street community garden”]. [Name] was one of us for [number] years. [He/She/They] [what they brought to the group]. We’ve talked about it a lot this week and we all agree we’re better people for having known [him/her/them]. We’ll keep a spot open for you, [Name].
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Workplace Memorial Speeches
Workplace memorials are a bit different. Sometimes they’re part of the family’s service and sometimes they’re a separate gathering at the office for colleagues who couldn’t make it to the funeral. Either way the tone should be a little more measured. You’re speaking for a team, not just yourself.
13. From a Manager or Boss
Thank you all for being here. For those who don’t know me, I’m [Your Name] and I had the privilege of working with [Name] for [number] years as [his/her/their] manager.
On paper [Name] was our [job title]. In real life [he/she/they] was the person everyone went to when something broke, when a deadline was looming or when you just needed someone to tell you it was going to be okay.
[He/She/They] [a specific work memory, such as “stayed late the night before our biggest launch to help a brand new hire who was totally lost” or “brought homemade cookies every single Friday for six years”].
Our team has lost a colleague, but a lot of us have lost a friend too. To [Name]’s family, please know how much [he/she/they] mattered here. We’ll keep doing the work the way [he/she/they] taught us to.
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14. From a Coworker
Hi, I’m [Your Name]. [Name] and I sat next to each other for [number] years, which means I know way too much about [his/her/their] lunch habits and [favorite sports team].
Work can be stressful and boring and frustrating, sometimes all in the same afternoon. [Name] made it better. [He/She/They] was the one who noticed when you were having a rough day and showed up at your desk with [coffee/chocolate/a terrible joke].
The office is going to feel really different without [him/her/them]. I’m going to miss our [morning chats/inside jokes/walks to the coffee machine]. Thank you for making the hard days easier, [Name].
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Memorial Speeches for a Community, School or Club
When someone was a big part of a church, a school, a sports club or a neighborhood, a separate community memorial is pretty common. These speeches are usually given by someone in a leadership role and they speak for the whole group.
15. For a Teacher or School Staff Member
Good evening. I’m [Your Name], [your role at the school].
For [number] years [Name] [taught/coached/worked in the front office] here at [school name]. In that time [he/she/they] [rough number, such as “taught more than a thousand students”]. I’d guess a lot of you are sitting in this room right now.
What made [Name] special wasn’t just what [he/she/they] taught. It was how [he/she/they] made people feel. [He/She/They] believed in kids who didn’t always believe in themselves. [A short specific memory or quote from a student or colleague.]
Our hallways will be quieter without [him/her/them], but the lessons are still here, in every one of you. Thank you, [Name], for everything you gave to this school.
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If you’re writing a longer tribute our eulogy examples for a teacher may help.
16. For a Club, Team or Organization Member
Hello everyone. I’m [Your Name], [your role, such as “president of the Riverside Garden Club”].
[Name] joined us back in [year]. [He/She/They] [what they did for the group, such as “never missed a meeting,” “organized every single bake sale” or “kept score for our softball team for twenty years”].
Every group has a few people who hold it together without ever really being asked to. [Name] was one of those people. A lot of what we do here, we do because [he/she/they] started it.
We’ll be [a tribute, such as “dedicating this year’s spring show to him” or “naming the annual award after her”]. It feels like the least we can do. Thank you, [Name].
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A Memorial Speech for a Celebration of Life
A celebration of life is a type of memorial that focuses more on the joy of the person’s life than on the loss. The speeches can be lighter, funnier and a bit more casual. There’s a full guide on what to say at a celebration of life if you want more ideas, along with these celebration of life eulogy examples.
17. An Upbeat Celebration of Life Speech
Hi everybody, I’m [Your Name]. Before anyone gets too teary, I’ve been given strict instructions. [Name] told me more than once that if anybody cried at [his/her/their] party, I was supposed to remind them [he/she/they] had a good run. So consider yourselves reminded.
And what a run it was. [Name] [a couple of big life highlights, such as “traveled to 31 countries, ran three marathons and still never learned to parallel park”].
But the best thing about [Name] wasn’t the big adventures. It was that [he/she/they] made ordinary days feel like a party. A Tuesday night dinner. A drive to the hardware store. Somehow it was always fun.
So today, let’s do what [he/she/they] would want. Eat the food, tell the stories and raise a glass. To [Name].
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If the speech ends with a toast our guide on how to make a funeral toast has some extra tips.
Anniversary and Dedication Speeches
Not every memorial happens right after a death. Some families hold a gathering on the first anniversary and others mark the moment with a bench, a tree or a plaque. These speeches tend to be shorter and a bit more reflective.
18. A One Year Anniversary Memorial Speech
Thank you all for coming today. It’s hard to believe it’s been a whole year since we lost [Name].
This year has had a lot of firsts. The first birthday without [him/her/them]. The first holidays. The first time something funny happened and I reached for my phone to call [him/her/them] before I remembered.
What I’ve learned is that grief doesn’t really get smaller. We just slowly get a bit bigger around it. And the people in this room are a big part of the reason we’ve been able to do that.
So today let’s remember [Name] the way [he/she/they] deserves. With stories, with laughter and with love. We miss you every day, [Name].
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For something to read alongside it these death anniversary quotes can be a nice addition.
19. A Bench, Tree or Plaque Dedication Speech
Thank you for joining us. We’re here today to dedicate this [bench/tree/plaque] in memory of [Name].
We chose this spot because [Name] [reason, such as “walked this path every morning for twenty years” or “said this was the most peaceful place in town”]. It felt right that something of [him/her/them] should stay here.
The [plaque/bench/tree] reads “[inscription].” Every time we sit here, or every time someone who never met [him/her/them] stops to read those words, [Name] will be remembered a little bit more.
[Name], this one’s for you.
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If you’re still choosing the inscription take a look at these memorial plaque wording examples. And if the memorial includes scattering ashes our guide on what to say when scattering ashes goes well with this.
Closing and Thank You Speeches
The closing is easy to forget about when you’re planning a memorial but someone needs to do it. It’s the moment that tells people the service is over, thanks them for coming and points them toward whatever happens next. It’s usually the same person who gave the welcome, though it doesn’t have to be.
20. Closing Remarks from the Family
Before we finish, I just want to say thank you. Thank you to everyone who spoke today, and to everyone who listened.
Thank you to [names of people who helped, such as “Aunt Linda for the flowers” or “the staff here at the center”]. And thank you to everyone who sent cards, dropped off meals or just checked in over the last few weeks. You’ll never know how much that helped.
[Name] would have loved seeing all of you here together. Please stay as long as you like. There’s food and coffee in [location], and if you have a photo or a story you haven’t shared yet, we’d love to hear it.
Thank you for loving [Name] with us.
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21. Closing with a Short Reading
Some people like to end with a few lines of verse. If you’d like to use something here this is a short original piece we wrote for exactly this moment. You’re welcome to read it at a memorial.
As we finish today, I’d like to leave you with a few lines that say it better than I can.
To laugh a little, to say goodbye,
To hold the ones who hold the memories
And wipe the tears from tired eyes.
You were the voice across the table,
The steady hand, the open door.
And though the chair sits empty now,
The love is here forevermore.
Sympathy Message Ideas
Thank you all for being here. Please go gently, and look after each other.
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You’ll find plenty more readings in our collection of funeral poems if you want to use something different.
Tips for Giving a Memorial Speech
Writing the speech is probably the easier part. Standing up and saying it out loud in front of a room full of grieving people is where most of us struggle. A few things that really do help:
- Print it out in a big font. Your hands might shake and your eyes might blur. Size 16 or bigger with plenty of space between lines makes it so much easier to find your place.
- Read it out loud at least three times beforehand. You’ll find the sentences that look good on paper but are awkward to say when spoken. You’ll also get some of the crying out of the way before the day.
- Time yourself. Then cut a bit. Nerves usually make people speed up but pauses for emotion slow you right back down.
- It’s okay to cry. Nobody in that room will think less of you. Stop, take a breath, have a sip of water and carry on when you’re ready.
- Have a backup reader. Give a copy to someone you trust. If you really can’t get through it they can step in and finish for you. Just knowing they’re there can take a lot of the pressure off.
- Check with the family first. If you’re planning to tell a funny story or mention something personal run it past someone close to the family before the service.
- Don’t try to cover everything. Other people are speaking too. Pick one or two memories and trust the rest of the room to fill in the picture.
For more on what’s appropriate to say on the day itself take a look at our guide to what to say at a funeral.
Final Thoughts
Hopefully these memorial speech examples have given you a starting point. You can change whatever you need to and make it your own. Whatever you end up saying the fact that you stood up to say it will mean more than you know.
